Will You Follow Me?
by Therm
Summary: Huge Update! Seven new chapters! Shawn Michaels get himself involved with the wrong type of person, someone destructive. Will the one person who cared before come through for him now?
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Will You Follow Me?  
****Summary**: You don't always realise how much you care about someone, until you can't have them any more.  
**Warnings**: Slash, physical violence in an abusive way and stalking.  
**Pairings**: Shawn/OC, Shawn/Kevin

_'Every move you make, every vow you break,_

_every smile you fake, every claim you stake,_

_I'll be watching you.'_

**Chapter One**

Kevin opened the door ready to chew the head off of whoever was stood there. But no words came out once he opened the door.

At his door Shawn Michaels stood, shivering and half dressed.

"What the hell...." Kev asked, surprised to see his friend there and in such a state. Without a moments hesitattion he pulled him into the room before anyone saw Shawn. The last thing he needed was people starting any kind of rumours about him. "What's going on?" Kev asked once the door was closed.

"I just... I wasn't feeling so well... I... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come here at this time... I- I can go if you want." Shawn said.

Kevin heard the offer for Shawn to leave, but there was nothing in his voice that sounded like he meant it. "Don't be stupid. You're here now, you stay here." Kevin studied Shawn for a minute. He noticed Shawn's unease at the scrutiny. "Shawn, don't be mad but, have you taken something?"

"No!" He denied instantly. "I....." He faltered. "Yeah... yeah I did. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Looks like you had a bad reaction is all. You wait it out here with me, bud. I'll take care of ya." He wrapped an arm around his friend and lead him towards the bed and didn't notice as Shawn winced in pain at his touch.

**

Kevin woke up just before 11am. He stretched his limbs before opening his eyes.

His mind flashed back to the night before, Shawn arriving in the middle of the night, looking a little worse for wear.

The memory was hazy now, but as he sat up there was no trace of Shawn. Had he dreamt up the whole thing?

*

"I can't believe you." The voice spat. "Why would you do that to me? Don't you think I was worried about you?"

"I'm sorry." Shawn said, feeling guilty for leaving in the night.

"No, I'm sorry, sorry I love you too much. Maybe this whole things a mistake. Maybe you don't want to be with me afterall."

"I do.. it's just, I'm... I don't know, it's my first time...."

"With a guy, I get that Shawn, but I'm a still human. Have you ever done that to a lady before, left her in the middle of the night?"

"No...."

"But if it's a guy it's fine to do?"

"That's not it, Seb. I just..."

"It doesn't sound like you know what you want, Shawn. I think maybe we're not the right match for each other."

"We are." Shawn protested, desperate not to lose his new partner.

"Come on, this is all so secretive. Why is that? Ashamed of me?"

"No, of course not."

"Well it seems like you are. And I'm the one dating a wrestler."

"Everything was just rougher than I though it'd be."

"You didn't like it rough?"

"I don't know...."

"Well, I told you what it would be like, I thought you'd be able to take it is all."

"I can take it...."

"I know, but you're used to soft gentle women making love to you. This is raw, passion Shawn. What is love without blood, huh?"

Shawn looked away.

"Okay, have it your way. I guess I'll see you around." He headed for the door.

"No, don't go. Please."

"You gonna make it worth my while?"

**

The bar was packed.

Hunter sat at the table, the three men with him all more than a little drunk. There were times like this when Hunter wished the three guys he hung out with didn't find if vital to get completely smashed every time they went out. Hie scanned the crowd for Shawn.

He'd gone to get some drinks a while ago and should be back by now. He wasn't very drunk. He'd had a couple of drinks, but nothing like normal. Hunter had asked him a couple of times if he was okay but he'd shrugged it off, said he was fine.

He spotted the Texan stood near one of the exits talking to a man, a few years older than Shawn and from the look on his face, they weren't having a friendly conversation. The older guy put a hand on Shawn's arm which he knocked off with some force before storming outside. The other man disappered off into the crowd.

"Where's the drinks?" Sean asked from the corner ot the table they sat at.

"You're drink collector has just left the building." Hunter said. Noting the look of bewilderment he received, he smiled. "Don't worry, I'll go sort it out." Leaving his seat, he made his way over to the door Shawn headed out of. He stopped not far outside the doors and looked around for him.

He spotted him not far from the bar, sat on the pavement. Hunter made his way over and stopped with a fair distance between them. "Hey."

Shawn hadn't noticed his approach and looked up to see who'd come out to him. "Oh hey." He replied.

"You okay?"

"Yeah." Shawn replied.

"You don't seem to be in the party mood."

"I'm trying not to drink so much. I'm fed up of forgetting half the nights I spend out."

"Fair enough. So why are you out here?"

"I just wanted to get away from the crowd... the noise."

"Who was that guy?"

"Some weird fan. Well, I say fan...."

"A douche?"

"Pretty much." Shawn agreed.

"Well, I guess I'll go back inside and make sure those three are behaving themselves."

"Hunter?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Course you can."

"It's kinda private. I haven't said anything to anyone else about this...." Shawn hesitated. He looked to the younger man.

"They won't hear anything from me. You know you can trust me." Hunter assured him.

It was what Shawn wanted to hear. "Okay, theoritically, if you were dating someone and it was really new and they asked you to do something for them, would you do it?"

"Well... I don't know, that's kinda..... it depends on what it was."

"Well nothing bad, you know, not malicious or hurtful. Just, something for the relationship."

"Okay, so let me try and make a sceario in my mind. Your girlfriend wants you to do something for her and it wouldn't hurt anyone at all, but would make her happy. That it?"

Shawn nodded. "Well I gotta say if it were me, I'd do it. Especially if you think it's someone special. I take it this girls special?"

"Yeah."

"Then, go for it."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I'm sure it'll be worth it."

"Thanks."

"No problem. You gonna come back in soon?" Hunter asked.

"Yeah."

"I'll get the drinks in, okay?"

Shawn watched Hunter go through the doors. Once he was out of sight, Shawn took his cell phone out. He dialled Sebastian's number. He hadn't saved it on the phone yet, but he'd remembered it.

It rang several times before it was answered.

"Hi." Shawn said.

"I knew it would be you."

"I've been thinking." Shawn said.

"And?"

"I don't want us to be over."

"So?"

"So... I thought that's what you wanted?"

"Us to be together? Of course it is. But Shawn, you need to come round to my way of thinking, okay? Learn to live a little."

"You know how much I want this?"

"Sure. I want it to. I want you like I want to breath, like I need to sleep and eat and drink. I need you to be with me. When are you off next? Cause I think we should meet up."

"I'm working until Thursday, so I could be with you on Friday."

"Sounds like a date to me."

"Okay, so I'll call and we can arrange where later."

"Sure thing. Bye." Sebastian cut the conversation off before another word was spoken.

The words 'I love you' died on Shawn's lips.


	2. Chapter 2

** Chaper Two **

"I'm not hungry, Kevin said, pushing the plate of food away from him as the four men sat in the canteen of the arena.

The others around the table didn't look a lot happier, and silence loomed among them until it was broken by Scott. "So, did you speak to him then? What did he say?" His questions were directed at Hunter.

"Well, I didn't speak to him much, I just caught the back end of his conversation with Vince. And it wasn't so much a conversation as Shawn storming off and Vince shouting after him."

"But you went after him, right?" Kid queried.

"Yeah, but he was in no mood to talk. Just said he was quitting and never coming back. But he wouldn't say why. He just told me to piss off and leave him alone."

"Sounds about right." Scott scoffed.

"The whole thing is stupid." Kev grumbled.

"We don't even know what the thing is." Kid added.

"Whatever it is, Shawn's gonna get his ass fined for leaving."

"Not a problem if he does quit." Hunter added.

"He won't quit. He's not that stupid."

"Right." Kev said, standing up. "Time to find out what exactly it is that Shawn's done this time."

**

Kevin sat at Vince's desk, staring in disbelief at his boss.

"You sure there wasn't some mix up?" He asked.

"Positive. He failed his drug test for steroids. It's not the first time either, as you're well aware."

"You really think he's taking them?"

"These tests are evidence."

"Yeah, but he doesn't look like he's taking steroids."

"Doesn't he?" Vince challenged. "You can't deny his physique has improved recently."

"Not steroid taking though."

"I can't look the other way on this. He failed the test."

"You can do whatever you like. No one knows what goes on behind the these doors and you know that."

"I can't cover this up. Look, provided he keeps his cool and doesn't make this any worse for himself, he can come back and it won't be held against him.

"You think he'll do that?" Kevin asked.

"If he wants his job back here, it's what he'll have to do."

**

Shawn sat on the sofa as Sebastian came through, carrying two cups of coffee.

"I'm glad you've calmed down. Now, tell me what happened." He said, placing a coffee next to Shawn on the table as he took a sip from his own cup.

Shawn could feel himself getting angry again just thinking about his row with Vince. "I failed my last drug test. For steroids."

"What? How could you be so stupid?"

"No... I don't take steroids, that's what I don't get."

"So how did these drugs magically get in your system then?"

"I don't know. I think someone gave them to me with some of their pain pills."

"Their pain pills?"

"Yeah, you know. Sometimes someone gives you some of their prescription." Shawn explained. A sudden stinging attacked Shawn's skin. His brain struggled to comprehend what had happened. It wasn't until he looked up to Sebastian that it came together. The cup once brimming with coffee was now held empty, the last few drips spilling onto the floor, the rest of the liquid gently burnt at Shawn's skin.

"You idiot." Sebastian snapped.

"You burnt me." Shawn said, even as the cool air in the room began to cool the liquid that was on him.

A hard slap followed. "You're lucky I didn't have a pan of boiling water." He spat. "You risk your job and your life and then act like I'm in the wrong."

Shawn's hand gently touched the skin where Sebastian's blow had connected. He lowered his head. "You're right, I'm sorry. I guess I didn't think it through." Shawn said.

"It's okay." Sebastian amended. "I'm gonna make another coffee. Just don't give me another reason to throw it at you." He laughed and Shawn smiled in response. He loved Seb's laugh. "Drink yours up." Shawn did as he was told as he waited for Sebastian to come back in again.

"So, I was thinking while I was in the kitchen, maybe you should call your boss up... Vic, is it?"

"Vince." Shawn corrected.

"Right. And tell him what you suspect but that you take his punishment and you're sorry for any trouble caused."

"Yeah. I think... yeah, that's a good idea." Shawn agreed.

**

Vince put the phone down, slightly perplexed at the call he'd just received. Although it came just at the right time in many ways.

Outside the door were four of his wrestlers, waiting to see him. He suspected it was going to come down to them demanding that Shawn wasn't fired, as Vince had heard the rumour spread around amoung everyone backstage. He knew that would kick the Clique into action. Whatever anyone said about them, they were loyal as anything to one another and if they thought Vince was going to get rid of Shawn, they'd do something about it.

That was the furthest thing from Vince's mind, but he'd at least have the chance to discuss it with them and the conversation he'd just had.

He got his secretary to call the men into see him. Kevin sat down the others stood by the door. He expected Kevin to be the voice of the group and wasn't disappointed.

"So, what's happening with Shawn?" He asked, direct and to the point.

"Nothing. Everything's still as it was yesterday. In fact, they're better."

"Better how?" Scott asked.

"Just before you all came in to see me, I had a phonecall from Shawn. He apologised for his outburst the day before, re-stated that he did not take any steroids. He admitted something to me as well. He told me that in the past, he made the mistake of taking pills given to him by other wrestlers. He wouldn't name names but he assured me that to secure his future career in the company, he would not be doing anything like that again. He also said that he'd take his six weeks off and be ready to come back in whatever role I saw fit."

**

Sebastian was laid on his bed when Shawn came through.

"I did it, I called Vince and apologised."

"Good boy." Sebastian said. "So what are you going to do for your six weeks off?"

"I don't know, I haven't thought about it really."

"I thought that maybe we should do some stuff. I mean, I know we've not been together for very long and your job usually takes you away all the time. Maybe it's our time to get away."

"Really? That would be great." Shawn enthused. "I kinda hoped you might want to spend some time together but I didn't want to push the idea. We could go and get something booked straight away. Or I will if you don't wanna come. But you can pick the place we go. I don't care where we go. "

"Okay, okay, calm down." Seb said, smiling at Shawn's enthusiasm. "I think time together will be good for us. I think it's time we go to know each other better. I can't wait for you to see the real me."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Sebastian looked in the mirror trying to tease his hair into style.

His short style always looked scruffy after he woke and before he had a chance to shower and wash it. Even though no one would see it but Shawn, he always liked to look good. He knew he was a good looking man, but he also put time and effort into his looks. He always wore smart clothes. He didn't do simply casual. Before he went out anywhere he'd make sure he shaved, hated the dark stubble that littered his face otherwise.

He attempted to tame a section of his hair that seemed to have a mind of it's own. He felt the anger in him rise at his futile attempts to get it neat again.

He slammed his hand against the sink. He walked through to the bedroom. Shawn was still sleeping on the bed. Sebastian watched him sleeping peacefully. Content with where he was, who he was with. His golden, wavy locks seemed to be on display around him. Taunting Sebastian with the arrangement.

Showing how sleep didn't affect his style.

The bastard. He'd show him.

**

Shawn stretched contently in bed.

He looked at the space to his left. The bed was empty. "Seb?" Shawn called.

"I'm through here." Sebastian called. "I'll be right in. I have a surprise for you."

Shawn smiled as he laid in bed. He wondered what the surprise could be. Sebastian came through with a tray. It seemed as though Sebastian had called down for some room service and had got Shawn a breakfast all laid out. "I can't believe you did all this for me." Shawn said.

"That's not the surprise." Sebastian said. He put the tray down on the bed as he reached into his pocket. He held Shawn's gift out in front of him and watched for Shawn's reaction.

Shawn's face dropped as he looked at the thing Sebastian held out.

"What...."

"You don't like it, do you?"

"You've cut half my hair off?" Shawn asked, a mixture of shock and anger.

"Oh I see, I do something nice for you and this is how I get treated?"

"Nice? That's your idea of nice?" Shawn said.

"Fine then." Sebastian shot back, flipping the tray of breakfast so the contents tipped all over the floor. "Fuck you." He grabbed his jacket as he left the room, slamming the door behind him.

**

Shawn pushed the door shut behind him and took the baseball cap off, discarding it now it was no longer needed.

Shawn went through to the bathroom and studied his hair. It was a lot shorter, but the stylist had done a great job making it work for him. It wasn't that it looked bad, but he just liked having long hair. He tied his hair into the band around his wrist. He was still mad at Sebastian and he wanted him to at least feel like Shawn hated it, even if he knew he'd quickly get used to it.

It didn't seem as though Sebastian had come back, but his things were still here, which seemed like a good sign.

After he'd stormed out, Shawn had cleared the mess up he'd made and then had called reception and got them to book an appointment for him to have his hair sorted and book him a cab. It was the advantage of staying in such a luxury resort, nothing was too much trouble.

Shawn decided he best check in with Kevin and see if he were missing him at all. He sat on the sofa.

He waited as the phone rang several times before Kevin answered it. Shawn was relieved to hear happiness in Kevin's voice, as though the absence between them recently would somehow ruin their friendship. He knew Kevin wasn't about to turn his back on him, yet whenever he was away and didn't speak to him for too long, Shawn would feel the same way every time. Shawn sometimes wondered if Kevin knew how important he was to him. He loved the other guys, no question, but if they left and went their own way, fair enough. But there was something different with Kevin.

Kevin asked if Shawn was okay and where he was. There was nothing quite like talking to Kevin. It relaxed him, made him feel safe and comfortable. Like he could really be himself. The fact that he was keeping a secret from him made the guilt eat at him a little and he hated that feeling. But he knew he wasn't ready to tell anyone about Sebastian yet, especially not Kevin. He was more worried about how he'd take it than anyone else.

"So, when you coming back from your break?" Kevin asked.

"I don't know. I got two weeks booked. I might come back after that, depends how I feel."

"Aw, well I hope you come back, it's not the same without you around."

"I'm still around."

"Yeah, but, you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I get it. You miss me and can't stand to be apart from me." Shawn mocked.

"Whore." Came a voice behind Shawn. He turned round even knowing the voice belonged to Sebastian. "I'll fucking teach you a lesson." He threatened, voice filled with rage.

Shawn barely managed to blurt out he'd call Kevin back before he hung up. He heard Kevin call out, asking who it was that was talking, but Shawn couldn't worry about that right now.

"Where have you been?" Shawn asked. Sebastian wasn't interested in what Shawn had to say though.

"You're disgusting..." He spat.

"It was Kevin." Shawn explained.

"I'll teach you a lesson you're never gonna forget."

**

Kevin waited as the phone kept ringing.

He must have waited at least two minutes before he ended the call. The frown he wore caught the attention on the other men with him.

"What's wrong?" Sean queried.

"I can't get through to Shawn."

"He's on holiday, he probably doesn't want to talk." Sean shrugged.

"No, there's more to it than that."

"Oh he'll be fine." Kid dismissed. "He can take care of himself."

Kevin didn't say anything else, but the frown remained and he didn't stay long before he left the room.

"That's your fault." Scott chastised kid.

"What?"

"You know he's worried, stop being such a jerk."

"I can't help it if Shawn ditches him all the time...... "

"Shut up." Scott said, smacking the Kid round the head.

"I'll go see if Kev's okay." Hunter said, dismissing himself. He didn't have to go far. Kevin was trying the phone again. Hunter stood with him as he waited for an answer.

"Nothing." Kev said. He sighed before turning to Hunter. "I know you think I'm crazy, but I don't get why he hasn't answered."

"Maybe he's just left his phone somewhere."

"Normally, I wouldn't be bothered but...."

"But what?" Hunter pressed.

"I haven't told anyone this, I don't want to freak out if every thing's fine. I was talking to him before, earlier on today and he was fine and well. But while I was talking to him, I heard someone shout out 'Whore' and that they'd 'teach you a lesson'. Some guy who sounded really pissed off."

"You think he was playing about with someone's girl and they got found out?" Hunter said, thinking how bad that situation could be.

"Not quite." Kevin said, confident he could guess what was actually happening. "I think we need to have a talk. There's a few things you might need to know."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

Hunter was perplexed as Kevin lead him off into an empty room at the arena, but he waited knowing that whatever he had to say must be important.

"So?" Hunter pushed.

"Shawn's kinda bi."

"Buy? Oh.. you mean sexually?"

"Yep."

"Okay." Hunter shrugged, not bothered by the revelation. "So, you think that the guy he was with was speaking to him like that?" Hunter summised, now understanding why Kevin was concerned as he was.

"Pretty much. And Shawn... he didn't sound scared, but he didn't sound too sure either."

"Well I guess he might not know this person too well."

"Me and Shawn, we kinda have a past too."

"Oh."

"It wasn't anything significant. Didn't even last very long. I ended it about two weeks."

"Wow, that was quick. How did Shawn take that?"

"Not too well. He wanted more out of it sooner than I did. I think I thought he just wanted to mess about and that's not what it was to him, so when I realised I finished it. He was pretty mad at me for a bit. It was harder cause we were together a lot, but he got over it."

"Well, I... I wouldn't have guessed." Hunter said.

"But this is the tough bit now because I still really care about him, a lot. I'm really worried."

"Kid's right though, he's probably fine. Maybe they just had a row and he doesn't wanna talk to you about it now he knows you know he was with a guy."

Kevin looked at Hunter as though he were a genius. "That's gotta be it! Would you call him? Not now, maybe a little bit later, just to make sure."

Hunter smiled. "Yeah, sure I will." He said, relieved to see some of the tension in Kevin ease.

**

Sebastian looked at the phone as the annoying tone rang over and over.

He picked it up. "Hello?" He snapped and waited as the person on the other end spoke. "No, he's not here now." He said, ending the call straight after he'd spoke to stop any futher conversation. He switched the phone off to avoid any more calls.

"Who was that?" Shawn asked.

"Didn't I tell you to shut up?" Sebastian said. "I've tied you up, don't make me stick a gag in that mouth of yours." Shawn was sat on the bed. His arms were tied behind his back, his ankles also bound. Tightly too.

"You switched the phone off, they'll be worried now." Shawn said.

"They'll live. Now shut up."

"How long are you gonna keep me tied up here?"

"Until you learn your lesson. And apparently, you're an idiot who doesn't learn things."

"Please, why can't you just talk to me?"

"I'm through talking to you. I don't think you ever really wanted me. I think you wanted 'him' this whole time."

"That's not true." Shawn protested. "I do want you."

"Yeah? You really want me?"

"You must know I do."

Sebastian looked at Shawn. A sick and sinister sneer on his face "You can have all of me then."

**

Hunter stood in the hallway and looked at the phone, confusion evident on his features.

A hand clapped upon his shoulder. "It's called a cell phone. You use it to make calls." Came the mocking tone of Vince McMahon.

Hunter smiled slightly uneasy of what to say around his boss. Shawn and Kevin were comfortable enough to tell Vince everything they thought about anything, but he wasn't quite there yet. He laughed nervously. "Oh yeah, I know."

"So why do you look quite so concerned?"

"I'm trying to get hold of someone and I can't... that's all."

"Shawn?"

"How'd you know?" Hunter confirmed.

"I run this company, I know everything."

"I guess maybe he doesn't wanna talk to us right now."

"Maybe."

"What else can we do but wait?"

"Whatever you have to do."

"I need to go talk to someone. Thanks." Hunter said.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

"I'm sorry." He muttered.

He looked at the man on the bed. He'd untied his wrists and ankles but he still didn't move an inch. "C'mon baby, I know you're awake. I said I'm sorry, what more do you want?" He asked.

Shawn cracked his eye open slightly. "Just go." He said, his voice cracking with the emotion.

"Don't do this to me. I love you. I made a mistake, and I'm sorry. Don't punish me for it."

"Go." Shawn repeated his voice souinding as weak as he felt.

Without another word, Sebastian got up and left the room. Shawn didn't move until he heard the front door close. He carefully sat up. His whole body ached.

He'd never seen someone lose it before, not like Sebastian had. He staggered to his feet, ignored the pain and the blood that the movements caused, he ignored the soiled sheet on the bed and blocked how and what he'd do with it before room service came to clean the room. He made his way to the bathroom and leaning against the basin, looked in the mirror. His face displayed the signs up the beating he'd received. One eye slightly swollen, and busted open too. His jaw felt tender but there was no marks on it just yet.

He was certain that would come out in time.

He pulled his shirt together as his body reacted to the faint chill in the room. Sebastian had ripped half of them off as he had fought to get some physical contact with Shawn skin, biting and clawing against him in his rage.

Shawn moved from the bathroom and so he could see the door. The one which Sebastian had left through. His heart and mind caused confliction as he knew that he still wanted to be with him, but the smart thing to do would be get out now before he came back.

He knew if he returned he wouldn't hurt him. He turned from the door back towards the bedroom. He intended to change his bloodied clothes but something caught his eye. His phone.

Sebastian had turned it off and Shawn hated being out of contact with people. He went over and picked it up, sitting on the bed as he waited for it to come back on. He felt he should call Kevin. He felt rude seeing as the last conversation he'd had with him he'd ended up all but hanging up on him.

He looked at the phone, undecided with what he should do for the best.

The decision wouldn't be his to make though.

**

Shawn had barely switched the phone on again before the door opened.

Sebastian stood there, his face blank. The rage from earlier had gone, but so had his remorse. "I came to get my stuff." Sebastian said, walking through.

Shawn said nothing, turning his attention to his phone. He didn't want to talk to Sebastian, just wanted him to leave. Subconsciously, Shawn wrapped his arms around himself in a protective manner.

Sebastian packed his things in his bag quickly before he walked back through to the door. He put the bag down at the door. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry about what happened." He said, sincerity spilling from his mouth with every word.

Shawn kept his eyes away, didn't want to look at Sebastian's face. His hands clutched the phone tightly as he dialled Kev's number, felt safer with it just being on the screen. Like Kevin was here with him, closer. But it didn't stop his heart from hammering in his chest as he worked to keep his emotions in check.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Sebastian asked. His voice was laced with strength. Shawn felt like nothing when this man was with him.

"Goodbye." Shawn said. But he heard it, felt the lump that made the words come out weak. Pathetic.

Stepping closer to Shawn, Sebastian could almost smell the blood of his prey. "I could stay if you want me to."

"No." Shawn replied.

"You don't mean it though, Shawn."

"I want you out."

"Look me in the eye and tell me." Sebastian said, now only a short distance between them.

Shawn looked up and as he did, Sebastian lunged at his throat. Shawn discarded his life line; his phone... now he had no safety net there, nothing that gave him even the slightest power when faced with Sebastian. But before he'd let the phone release from his grip he'd called Kevin.

And as Kevin picked up, he heard the sounds of his friend being beaten and abused on a harrowing call he could do nothing to stop, only listen in stunned silence for fear of the call being detected making matters worse.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

There was almost no sound, except harsh ragged breaths.

Kevin watched silently as Shawn stirred in his sleep, unsettled by the torment that haunted his dreams. He didn't want to disrupt Shawn's rest, but he didn't want the other man to have to go through it all again.

He waited. Watched. Shawn was sprawled across the bed as Kevin looked on from a chair nearby.

He'd needed to be here with Shawn. He'd left straight away. Kept a conversation going with him as much as he possibly could. Hated the idea of leaving Shawn's feeling abandoned when he needed someone the most. He got the first flight out to California, had a cab waiting to take him to Shawn's hotel. He spoke to him almost constantly, nothing important just tried to soothe Shawn, it didn't seem as though Shawn really listened, he stayed silent.

It wasn't until Kevin arrived Shawn seemed to fall apart.

Kevin tried not to react to the state Shawn was in, not just emotionally, but physically. He was wrecked. Shawn cracked the minute Kev stepped foot in the room. A complete sobbing, hysterical wreck. The toll quickly reduced Shawn to exhaustion and Kevin sat with him as he lay on the bed trying to fight off sleep, gently rubbing his arm, hoping to soothe him into submitting to the rest his body needed.

Another whimper from the younger man bought Kevin's full attention back. He studied Shawn as his face scrunched up. Kevin wished he could just remove them from Shawn and let him rest properly. He'd had the argument with Scott before that he couldn't protect Shawn from everything. He definitely couldn't protect him from what was in his own mind.

Shawn's eyes flashed open, met Kevin's gaze before the eyelids closed again. He wasn't sure if Shawn was still sleeping or not. Standing up, Kevin made his way to the bed and sat next to the other man.

"I wanted to know you were still there." Came Shawn's sleep laced voice.

"Where else would I be." Kevin reassured him, laying a hand on Shawn's head. He was hot and his hair was damp with sweat.

"I thought you might be a dream." Shawn said, eyes still closed.

Kevin felt Shawn's hand grab a hold of his t-shirt fabric as though it were some kind of comfort blanket.

He resisted the temptation to grab Shawn's hand. He wanted to comfort, not confuse. Shawn was too fragile at the minute to be messed with. His battered body was a testament to that. "Any time you need me, you know I'll be there." Kevin answered. "We're Clique."

He added, trying to take out anything that might mislead Shawn. He was delicate. Needed help. Shawn didn't say anything, kept his eyes closed as he lay there, not letting go of Kevin's shirt.

Shawn didn't say anything else, he just fidgeted on the bed, moving himself closer to Kevin. The older man wondered if he was even aware he was doing it or if he was just seeking comfort.

"Shawn, this guy..." Kevin started. He noticed immediately how Shawn tensed.

"I don't wanna talk about it." Shawn said.

"I need to know." Kevin said gently, putting his hand on Shawn's. The one that was clinging to him as though he were his lifeline.

"I..." Shawn started but was cut off by a furious banging at the door.

Kevin listened as he heard someone shouting. He looked at Shawn. "That's him, isn't it?"

He didn't need to answer.

Kevin stood up, rage motivating him and Shawn watched the shirt he held onto tightly rip as he desperately tried to keep Kevin next to him.

It took just a few strides for Kevin to reach the bedroom door.

"Don't leave me here." Shawn said, hoping to stop Kevin from opening the door. But it wasn't enough. He'd decided what he wanted to do. He continued storming towards the door. He was ready to open it when Shawn's voice yelled behind him, desperate. "No, please don't hurt him."

Kevin's hand froze inches from the handle. He turned to face Shawn. He'd followed him through in his attempt to stop Kevin opening the door.

"You don't want me to hurt him." Kevin said, repeating Shawn's words, although they seemed almost tainted with disgust.

"Please.." Shawn said.

Kevin's hand dropped by his side. The ripped shirt tickled at his skin and noticing the mess, he ripped the fabric away violently, releasing frustration onto that instead of the man who'd been on the other side of the door.

Shawn watched Kevin. Watched him angrily discard the fabric onto the floor. His angry eyes met with Shawn's almost terrified gaze.

He quickly retreated to the bedroom, as though Kevin's rage were his fault. He closed the door behind him, distance between them. Shawn clambered back onto the bed, pulling the duvet around himself protectively.

Shawn wondered what would have happened if Kevin hadn't been here. He was pretty sure that left alone, he'd have opened the door, let Sebastian in again.

He'd always been told he wasn't very bright. Maybe they were right about that.

But he knew Sebastian did care about him, but his temper just got the best of him a lot of the time. Maybe he bought the worst out of him. Maybe all this was his own fault.

And maybe none of this would have happened if Kevin hadn't rejected him in the first place.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

_'I just wanted you to love me the way I loved you.' _

Shawn looked at the message on his phone. From Sebastian. It had woke him up.

He noted with some sadness he was still alone, wondered if Kevin were still here with him.

He stared at the message, conflicted whether or not to reply. His head screamed for him not to do it. He knew it would be stupid, would lead to trouble. But part of him still wanted Sebastian there with him. When Sebastian wanted to, he showered Shawn with love and made him feel special. Like no one else had ever made him feel. With Kevin, it had just been sex. At least Sebastian wanted him for more than just that.

When the door opened, Shawn hid the phone.

"Good, you're awake." Kevin said coming over to the bed and sitting next to Shawn. He brushed the stray hairs away from Shawn's face before he pulled the covers back and took the phone Shawn hid. Shawn didn't try and stop it, but felt himself try and slide beneath the duvet more as Kevin read the message. "I'll look after this." Kevin said, pocketing the phone. "So come on, get yourself showered and changed and we're getting out of here."

"What?" Shawn asked.

"Leaving. Flights booked for a couple of hours time. I'm getting you home."

"Oh." Shawn said.

"You do want to go home, don't you?" Kevin asked. He'd not really considered it until now, just assumed it would be the place Shawn wanted to be.

"I guess. I just.... I don't want to have people ask me question I'm not willing to answer. And if my Mom finds out I'm back..."

"Yeah, I never thought about that." Kevin said. "Well, why don't you stay with me?"

"What?"

"Well why not? No one's gonna ask questions you don't wanna answer. Except maybe me."

"Kev..." Shawn started.

"I won't interrogate you or anything, but you know I'm gonna ask you about all this sooner or later. Won't matter if you're in Texas or Detroit- I'll ask you."

"Okay." Shawn said, sounding as though he were dreading such a conversation.

"Right so you want me to help you pack, or I can do it all if you're not feeling up to it."

"I think I'll be okay, Kev. I could use a shower first though. I'm disgusting." Shawn said

"Okay, so get a shower and I'll start packing for ya."

"You sure you don't mind? I don't want you to come all this way just to look after me."

"Hey, I always look after you. Go on, get your shower." Kevin said.

"I need a coffee to wake my up first, you want one?" Shawn offered as he got himself out of bed and stretched.

"Yeah sure. Just one sugar now though. I'm cutting down." Kevin said, heaving Shawn's half filled back onto the bed to pack his things away.

Shawn rolled his eyes at that but went off to the kitchen. Walking through, he saw a discarded bit of cloth in the bin. Puzzled as to what it was, he went over and plucked it from the bin.

He realised it was the fabric torn from Kevin's shirt earlier. He realised Kevin had ditched the shirt completely now. It wasn't in the bin, at least this one.

Without thinking about it, Shawn put the material in his pocket and continued to the kitchen, unaware Kevin was watching him.

**

_Lt. Commander Block__ "A__merican planes will always be superior as long as there are wonderful men like you in the cockpit. And German parts."_

Kevin laughed as he and Shawn lay on his bed watching the film. He'd decided the best way to settle Shawn in was with a film. He'd insisted Shawn have his room, seeing as his spare didn't have a TV in it at the moment and he figured Shawn might feel more secure there.

Shawn had tried to argue against it, but had failed. In fact, he gave up arguing the point, which wasn't like him.

Another funny line and Kevin roared with laugher again. Once he recovered he turned to Shawn. "Aren't you enjoying this?"

"It's okay." Shawn said.

Kevin studied him. He clearly wasn't enjoying himself. Picking up the remote he turned the TV off, silencing the film they'd be watching Hot Shots.

Kevin leaned on one elbow so he was facing Shawn. "So who was this guy? Where'd you meet him?"

"Does it matter?" Shawn said, huffing as he stayed laying on his back not looking in Kevin's direction.

"It matters when I get a call and all I can hear on the other end of the phone is you getting the crap kicked out of you." Kevin stated.

"So next time I won't call." Shawn said.

"Next time?! You think I'm ever letting you near that guy again."

"I didn't think it was your decision to make."

"Well hey, I'm obviously wrong about all this. Go home. Tell you're Mom and Dad why you're covered in bruises. Tell them why you cut your holiday short to come home and be on your own. And you can also talk about your new short hairdo you're sporting. You free to go at any time, I'm not stopping you." Kevin's tone wasn't harsh. He knew Shawn wasn't himself right now. He was scared and confused. Using a softer tone, he continued. "Shawn, just talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about. I made a mistake and that's it."

"And he was..."

"And he was someone else who didn't wanna be with me." Shawn said, hoping that his words hurt Kevin as much as he'd been hurt by both Kevin and Seb.

Kevin stopped leaning on his elbow and laid by Shawn's side on his back. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Shawn. I only ended it because we didn't want the same thing and I knew if I left it you'd just get hurt more."

It was Shawn's turn to lean over the other man. "There's no way you could have possibly hurt me more." Shawn laid back down again, knowing his anger was being misdirected at Kevin. "I met him at some club. He was nice."

"You thought he was." Kevin corrected, still sore from Shawn's verbal attack at him.

"No, he was nice. He always said he loved me I just...I..." Shawn stopped. "It's.. it's too weird talking to you about this."

"It's me. You can tell me anything." Kevin said.

"No, it's because it's you that I can't." Shawn said. "This was a mistake. Maybe I should go home." Shawn sat up. He was tired and it was the last thing he wanted to do, but he couldn't just pretend everything was okay between him and Kevin when his feelings didn't change over time.

Kevin sighed. This had been a mistake but he wasn't going to admit it out loud. "At least stay tonight. I can drop you off at the airport. You can get some rest... win win. What do you say?"

"Okay." Shawn said.

"I'll let you get some rest." Kevin said, getting up off the bed. He stopped at the end of it. "You know, I know things are weird but I want things to be normal for us again. Eventually, you know."

"Me too." Shawn said.

"Too soon, huh?"

Shawn nodded.

"Oh, I'll just have my book." Kevin said, pointing to the novel he was reading. He went to grab it at the same time Shawn did and he ended up with his hand on top of Shawn's.

"Sorry." Shawn said, sliding his hand out from underneath Kevin's.

Kevin picked up the book, trying to shake off the intensity he felt touching Shawn. His hand was hot, he remembered those night's they had together. Shawn's whole body was always hot, almost burning.

He'd never been with someone like him before.

Maybe that memory was what made him lean in and kiss Shawn.

Maybe it was his way to diminish the guilt he felt at having hurt Shawn to begin with.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

"No... don't..." Shawn protested pushing Kevin away.

Kevin was almost panting with desire and lust for the younger man. He didn't want to stop. His attempt to land another kiss onto Shawn's lips failed as Shawn turned his head, making Kevin meet Shawn's cheek. His hands grabbed Shawn's face and turned his head towards him. He found his mark this time with a hard, desperate kiss. His hands moved down to Shawn's shirt and quickly slipped under it to touch Shawn's skin. Still burning.

"Stop..." Shawn said again.

Kevin halted again. This time hearing the desperation in Shawn's voice. He stood up wiping a hand over his mouth as he looked at Shawn. One look at the fear on his face stopped him looking and he turned, leaving the room as quickly as he could.

He marched into the spare room, horrified at what he'd done. He knew Shawn had been through hell and he'd done that to him.

It hadn't been about the sex, he'd wanted to protect Shawn. Wanted to be close to him. Let Shawn know that he was better and deserved better than he got from the creep he'd been with.

Running his hands through his hair Kevin realised that those feelings he didn't have for Shawn when they were together had suddenly shown up.

And the timing couldn't be worse.

**

Shawn felt sleep start to slip away from him as his tired frame ached for more rest, yet his mind was far too aware to let him continue.

Although he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep, he was determined not to make any movements yet. He ached like hell today and his mind could think of nothing else but Kevin last night. He wasn't sure he could face him this morning. There's was nothing he wanted to say to him- nothing Kevin could say that would make Shawn feel better.

It felt strange being in Kevin's bed again. Maybe that was why Kevin made a move on him. Got carried away in the moment. But it didn't feel right. Shawn shook off the feeling as best he could as he got out of the bed.. Kevin's bed and intended to have a shower but saw a note underneath the door. He picked it up and read Kevin's distinct handwriting.

It wasn't anything much, Kevin said that he'd had to go back to work and Hunter had some free time so was here to look after him. There was a brief apology- just sorry- and that was it. Shawn binned the letter and headed to the bathroom.

**

Hunter had heard Shawn moving around upstairs an hour or so ago and assumed he'd come down soon.

Almost half an hour later and everything had gone quiet and still no Shawn. Kevin had filled him in, glossing over the details of the phone call he'd got from Shawn, and what had happened the night before. Knowing everything from Kevin helped him, but as far as Shawn was concerned, Hunter knew nothing.

Deciding to check on Shawn with the guise of coffee, Hunter made his way upstairs with a mug of the hot liquid as his peace offering, should he be disturbing Shawn's rest.

He knocked on the door but got no answer so went in anyway. Shawn was on the bed asleep. Hunter could tell straight away as the older man was dreaming as he moved about restlessly on the bed, covers half fallen to the floor. Hunter gently woke him from his slumber. Eyes fell upon a darkened patch of skin on Shawn's toned body. Clearly badly bruised somehow. Shawn's eyes didn't want to open as he stretched his weary limbs. Another bruise on a leg. Arms too.

"I made you some coffee." Hunter said, ignoring what he saw.

"Don't throw it on me this time." Shawn said sleepily.

Hunter laughed. "Why would I throw it on you?" He asked, wondering if it was some weird Clique story he'd missed before. But Shawn opened his eyes and realised who he was talking to. Hunter knew that Shawn hadn't meant to say that to him.

His eyes said it all, but he smiled as though he knew it was Hunter all along and that it was part of an elaborate joke that Hunter didn't get.

He placed the cup down next to the bed and went over to the window. "It's a nice day out here. Wanna see?"

Shawn shrugged as he corrected the covers over his body, concealing what they hid.

Hunter opened the curtains as daylight spilled in from the world outside. "We could go and get some dinner out if you want."

"Nah." Shawn said, voice raspy from sleep.

"What do you wanna do then?" Hunter asked turning fully to look at the other man.

"Sleep."

Hunter's brow creased with concern. "You've slept for hours, Shawn."

"I'm tired." Shawn snapped.

"I get that, but maybe a little trip out might do you some good. A bit of fresh air."

"If I want fresh air, I'll open a window." Shawn replied.

"Okay, if you wanna stay in bed, that's fair enough. You want me to close the curtains again?" Hunter asked, deciding to leave Shawn to it.

"You saw, didn't you?" Shawn said.

"I didn't see anything." Hunter said closing the curtains and making his way to the door. He couldn't work Shawn out, he was too complex. Nothing was ever easy when Shawn was involved.

"Don't go." Shawn said as Hunter reached the door.

Hunter hesitated. Not willing to give in to Shawn's every whim, he made his way out the room. "I'll be down stairs if you wanna join me." He said as he walked away.

It wasn't just that he didn't want to stay in the dark with Shawn, more that he had to know what exactly had happened to Shawn.

And only one person could give him those answers.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Shawn made his way down the stairs not long after Hunter had left.

He didn't want to be alone, desired to be comforted by someone, even if he had to give in a little of what he wanted. The TV was on in one room, Hunter wasn't in it though. He quietly roamed around looking for the other man. Found him in the kitchen on the phone.

".... I know you can't tell me everything Kevin but I need to have some idea what I'm dealing with here. You know how difficult Shawn can be at the best of times let alone when he's in full psychotic mode...." Shawn backed away from the door for a second while Hunter was silent. "Look, fine, just tell me what happened."

Shawn could tell that Kevin was talking about it now, Hunter's reactions said it all.

Shawn had heard enough. He backed away from the room, hurt by what he heard. Eyes stung with tears that dared to fall unless he regained control. He went back through to the lounge, ready to retreat back upstairs. He spotted Hunter's cell on the side. Kevin still had his. It was probably hidden somewhere here, but he couldn't look for it, not with Hunter here. He quickly slid the phone in his pocket, watching all the while to make sure he wasn't being spied on by Hunter and went back upstairs.

He packed the few things he'd taken out of his bag and made his way back downstairs this time with his bag in tow. Hunter was still in the kitchen.  
He didn't even know Shawn had left.

**

Reading the messages received and sent from the phone made for an interesting, albeit disturbing, conversation.

_'Did you mean what you said?'_ One message asked and the reply; _'You're the only one for me. But I don't deserve you.'_ was almost sweet. If you didn't know the situation was what it was, you could pretend it was normal. A messed up relationship and two people working to fix it.

If only every was as simple as that. As black and white. It was never that simple. Could never be like that between the two of them. There was already too much history. Sadly it wasn't ancient history, it was still fresh and the wounds, quite literal as they were, were not healed, let alone faded by time.

_'If I were with you, I'd tell you I loved you every day. I'd never let you out of my sight again. Give me another chance, take me back.' _

It was pleading, begging for another chance. Not that he was worthy of it. He should beg for forgiveness and then leave forever. That wasn't what he had planned though. He didn't want to be forgotten.

_'I can't forget what you did to me. You hurt me and not just in the obvious way.'_

The obvious way... the physical abuse was the obvious thing, the mental torture was something else entirely. The emotional was what caused the most pain. Once the physical scars healed, they just became more emotional baggage.

_'It's because of him, isn't it?' _

Even reading it, it sounded forceful. An accusation more than a question.

_'No one else matters. It's between me and you and it's you I can't trust.'_

He sounded defiant, even if it was just masking fear.

_'It is him then. It's always been him coming between us. Why don't you get it- he doesn't want you.'_

Those mind games, yet again. Take him on a ride he didn't want to go on.

_'You're wrong. You don't know anything about us. But he'll always mean more to me than you ever could.' _

Just because his name was never mentioned, Kevin knew it was him. He felt proud of Shawn, standing up for himself.

_'Then why have you ran away from him.'_

No reply from Shawn.

_'Why are you right now sat at home alone, texting me. If I mean nothing to you.' _

He still didn't reply.

_'Your silence says it all.' _

_'It means nothing. I was busy.'_

He was growing weaker. Defeated by the truth.

_'Busy sitting, staring at your phone.'_

The messages had taken an eerie turn. The next one continuing it with _'Aren't you going to answer your phone?'_

_'Leave me alone!' _Was Shawn final reply.

Just one message left to read. Kevin clicked on it. _'Not until I'm finished with you.'_

**


End file.
